Practicing the techniques of charm from within

Possessing a charming way will open many doors. The latent charm lurking within you is your secret and hidden away gold mine. Your charm is like a pearl inside the oyster, and once it is discovered and polished can highlight and greatly enrich your personality and success.

 Charm is that intangible quality within you, that when uncovered and freed from suffocating baggage, can add a subtle power to your presence that is irresistibly pleasing. The influence of this charm will attract, calm, assuage, placate and delight anyone with whom you come into contact. The ability to win over and influence people is in direct proportion to the charm you are able to summon up and demonstrate.

 Charm can be developed like every other quality or attribute of the mind by adopting and practicing some basic rules. Adaptation, the art of agreeing with another person for the sake of amicability is lesson one. Finding common ground through genuine curiosity lowers defenses and paves the way for further exploration. Adaptation is an acknowledgment of another’s ‘right to be’ right or wrong. As Voltaire said, "I do not agree with a word you say but I shall defend to the death your right to say it." The goal is to charm not to reform.

 The primary rule is for you to be yourself. Any kind of physical makeover, including that phoney smile, won’t do the trick. Affectations and pretense, even a well rehearsed choreography, is swift and certain death to charm. It is easy enough to attract and get attention by artifice, but to influence anyone beyond surface pleasantries, you must possess the power of charm within. A smile may win a first look, but it takes the conscious power of charm to obtain results. Authenticity is genuine and indisputable, easily picked up by others as the real thing, where pretense is usually unmasked.

 By practicing the techniques of charm from within, you can put your prospect or antagonist at ease and even inspire them to do your bidding. Projecting charm requires give and take. The first technique is to listen. You must be an attentive listener interested in hearing what the other person has to say, which also means paying close attention and really comprehending what they have to say and where they are coming from in saying it.

 The second fundamental is to always be humble, gentle and polite. By adopting these traits you will project a gracious and friendly manner which communicates the attitude that you are both likeable and approachable. Treat all people that you meet as potential friends. By displaying an open and positive attitude, and making others feel that your own life was incomplete before having met them, empowers them, and in turn they will become endeared to you. Interest, kindness, and humbleness are a major part of being charming. Giving praise is another.

 Praise is like a rare gemstone which derives its worth from its scarcity. Praise is one of the greatest motivating forces there is, and when sincerely applied can work wonders. Praise a dog and he is your friend. Praise children and they will glow with joy. Praise your ability with gratitude and you increase the flow of intelligence into your endeavors. Positive praise feelingly applied is an active multiplier. Praise what you have and more will be available to you. Praise is a positive expression of appreciation. In the case of others, it gives hearty and warm approval and breaks down barriers. If anyone you meet deserves your approbation, by all means give it, and in so doing you enhance their appreciation of your own qualities, a win win situation powered by charm.

 The third element of charm is tolerance. Life is a compromise, and to realize and accept this adds to ones peace of mind and enjoyment. People are entitled to their own opinion, and possessing tolerance allows respect for diverse opinions, without necessarily believing or sharing them. Respect for another’s point of view will always enlarge your own world view. By exercising tolerance you dispel prejudice and vanity. It is the essential quality necessary to establish the true relationship between divergent situations on an impersonal basis. By becoming tolerant you learn not to take the world and the events and people in it too seriously, yourself included, thus enabling your sense of humor to expand. A true and easy smile and the ability to have a good laugh will relax you, and in so doing, aid you in peace of mind and efficiency. Tolerance and a good sense of humor are indeed additional gems to have in your crown of charm.

 Charm is the art of pleasing. You need to be poised along with possessing the ability to act natural. Your ability to be pleasingly spontaneous and to act natural is a reflection of your habits. If these habits have been formed through the proper training of grace, poise and cleanliness, then they add to your charm. Negative habits of sloth, crudeness and loutishness diminishes. Charm refines the essence of your personality and permits the radiant beauty of your real being to shine through. Possessing charm will greatly augment your effectiveness. It makes it possible for you to always present yourself in the most favorable light. Through the glow of charm you will feel healthier and those worry lines will soon be replaced by your infectious smile. So train and equip yourself in the art and power of charm. It will enrich your presence and add immeasurably to your personal satisfaction and happiness.

How to apply the Law of Attraction effectively in your own life?

Make denials and affirmations to suit your particular needs. Whatever you desire to do, affirm beforehand that you can do it, and that you will do it when the time for doing comes. Whatever disagreeable or difficult duty lies before you, deny failure, and affirm beforehand that you can and will do it, that already in your Mental World it is accomplished; then visualize yourself doing the thing calmly and without effort. Mentally see yourself dealing with a difficult or unpleasant matter, with calm dignity and ease. When the time for action arrives you will succeed.

 Concentrate your whole attention upon the meditations. If you find your thoughts wandering through lack of concentrative power make use of the following denial and affirmation. First of all cleanse the mind by the denial of evil and calm and strengthen it by the affirmation of good. You have by so doing raised yourself into your perfect Mental World, breathing the pure air of perfect mental freedom. Now say, "Mind wandering cannot affect me. I am a perfect MIND, part of the great Universal Mind that is everywhere and works in and through everything. Therefore my mental powers are perfect. It was a mistake that made me think I could not concentrate; it was simply a delusion of the physical senses. Now I know that this could never be, because I am a perfect Mind gifted with God-like powers." Now affirm as follows: "Now I know that I can concentrate on any subject I please. My potential powers are infinite, I have only to develop them, I have only to 'try' and I must succeed." Working in this way you will develop tremendous powers of Concentration.

 I send out my thoughts to all mankind and say: "Dear everybody, I love you." Like the beams of a searchlight my mental vision sweeps over all the continents and islands of the world, and visualizes all peoples, sending out to them a great beam of Love and Blessedness. Then it takes in all sky and sun and earth and sea, and the sweet breath of heaven. It embraces all animals and flowers and loveliness, it sweeps through a thousand sunsets and a million dew-washed fragrant dawns back to the one Source of all life--again affirming, "I love you, I love you." Then into my heart flows a great wave of divinest peace, a great inrush of the accumulated love-force of the invisible Universe, I become submerged in a sea of Infinite Blessedness. Thus in blessing others do I help to make the world a little better, and in return I am doubly blessed.

 For this week's visualizing exercise take six small articles and examine them very carefully one at a time. For instance, if one article is a lead pencil, look at it and see in what respects it differs from other lead pencils. You notice its color; its shape, either round, hexagon or oval; its point, well sharpened or otherwise; the maker's name and trade-mark; what kind of lead, either BB, B or JIB; the name of the pencil itself; its condition, scratches on the surface of the polish; all these and many other points should be minutely noticed. Examine each article in turn and just as minutely. When you have examined them all, shut your eyes and visualize each article, and see every point and peculiarity in your mind's eye, just as you did with your physical sight. Change the articles for new ones from day to day.

 If you lack knowledge of a certain subject and desire to gain this knowledge, then tell your subliminal mind what it is that you require; it will then either supply direct the knowledge that you need or bring to your notice the very book or course of lessons that you require. Also in solving your problems your subliminal mind may bring a sentence to your notice, which, directly you read it, tells you that it is the answer to your riddle. The more you can quieten the senses and the objective mind and rely upon your subliminal mind the greater will be your wisdom and understanding.

 In the letter I have sent you this week I speak of visualizing and affirming the success that you desire to demonstrate, fn the same way hold the picture of perfect health ever before your mind. Let it be a constant inspiration and source of radiant joy.

How to ooze magnetic attraction?

Beauty holds a golden mirror to the shimmering inner essence. It reflects true self-perception as well as the extent of one's discipline.

 Attractiveness indicates a sensitivity to those around us. Just as we shine our shoes, wash our cars or trim our lawns to provide “eye-candy” to passers-by, we keep our bodies in the pink of health to offer delightful icons worthy of emulation.

 I believe that beauty is not trivial; it is core to civilized society. Imagine everyone abandoning restraint and shuffling around in tattered clothes, drooping bellies, dishevelled hair, blackened fingernails and breath so foul only a mother could love? No one would be happy- except the mouthwash manufacturers. Those who shun beauty as superficial are probably too lazy to reach for a bar of soap or the jump rope.

 But, beautiful people are not necessarily supermodels with Greek-god faces and unreal proportions. That is a myth promulgated by sneaky salesmen of snakeoil creams and dangerous bust implants. Let them slather that muck on their faces 24/7. Then, I’d believe them.

 Beautiful people are Normal people who watch their diet, keep their bodies clean, and don tasteful, yet inexpensive clothing. They maintain an empowered lifestyle, indulge in mind-expanding books and engage in varied activity that enriches their awareness.

 Beauty, more importantly, is internal. The attractive assert their opinions and fight for convictions. Whether handsome or pretty, bland or plain, the internally beautiful betray an intelligence and burning diligence that reflects their personality. Recall that personality is molded by how we carry ourselves and associate with the world at large.

 Finally, beauty is holistic. Magnetic people take effort to be the best that they can be. They understand that they are fusions of body, soul and spirit. Hence, they build up each facet by honing their talents and passions. They may have ordinary faces but lead extraordinary lives. These exceptional people are the best humanity can offer; they easily outshine the empty-headed Greek Models of the catwalk.

 Augmenting beauty simply means caring of the body and the mind. It doesn’t take much effort, just a tad of self regulation. Here’s how to ooze magnetic attraction:

 1. Books and periodicals are your best friend. Beef up what’s in your head and rack up more beauty points with your enlightened discussions. Intelligence is attractive.

 2. Watch stand-up comedy. You will develop your sense of humour. Wit is a rare and valued commodity.

 3. Is that a burger you’re shovelling down your throat? Stop. You are literally what you eat. Want to be a lard bucket? Then chomp that burger.

 4. Soap, shampoo and mouthwash are better than all the pheromone sprays, libido enhancers and failed nose lifts. Good hygiene is the honey that attracts the delightful bees.

 5. Dress to impress- 24/7. You probably had one of those moments. There you were, in sloppy coveralls at the mall. Then you run into the boss or a beautiful stranger. Say this with me: “NEVER AGAIN.” One more time. “NEVER AGAIN.”

 6. Ask and Listen. The most dazzling conversationalists avoid monopolizing conversations. Rather, they ask tons of questions…. And listen for hours on end. Stop and think about that. Isn’t your best friend a great listener?

 7. Finally, think sexy. Feel sexy. You are what you think you are. Your body follows what the mind dictates. The $3000 executive coaches like to pass this astounding piece of common sense for a hefty fee. Save the money.

 So, get out there and glow. You can be attractive without those creams, lotions and surgeons.

 Be bold. Choose beauty.

What happens to our vibration when we are out of integrity?

There's no way to fake INTEGRITY. You are either are IN INTEGRITY offering a PURE positive vibration which the Law of Attraction responds to. Or you're OUT of INTEGRITY which creates a negative or mixed vibration, which the Law of Attraction cannot ignore.

 Here's a real-life story which demonstrates what happens to our vibration when we are out of INTEGRITY.

 I was feeling pretty upbeat after our coaching session yesterday and really excited about winning a prize pack from the radio station.

 After picking up my prize, I noticed Spyware, an electronics store, and decided to go in and compare prices with an item I had just bought from Radio Shack yesterday. Spyware had the exact same item on sale for $10.00 less so I bought it with the intention of returning the first item to Radio Shack. When I compared the two products they were exactly the same, with the exact same bar codes and packaging. However, I noticed the cheaper item had one wire a couple centimeters shorter than the more expensive item.

 I made a decision to return the item with the shorter wire (the one purchased at Spyware) back to Radio Shack and keep the original item. Thus saving $10.00 but keeping the better product.

 After the clerk had finished all the paperwork I felt extremely guilty. But then I rationalized it was too late to do anything about it and told myself I would just have to let this guilt go. What a way to bring my high vibration to a crashing halt. I reminded myself that this is why I shouldn't do things like this in the first place because not only can I not live with the guilt but now it is a double whammy because I'm so aware of my vibration and this is bringing it way down.

 Anytime we do something that is not in alignment with our core values, we feel negative emotions which hinder us from receiving the real desires of our heart.

 The antidote is simple: be honest, pay all debts, return what you've borrowed, speak kindly about others and keep your word. In other words, do nothing that will hinder the flow of pure positive energy toward you. Be true to your self an you'll open the way for receiving everything that will make you happy.

 This same client had such an opportunity to 'make it right' on an energetic level. Again, she wrote:

 I was feeling pretty bad when I returned to my office, and then remembered I needed to go to the bank. I went up to the bank machine and there was $40.00 sitting in the slot. Someone had forgotten to take it with them after they finished their transaction. They had also forgotten to take their bank slip. I took both out of the machine and put them in my pocket while I did my own banking.

 Now I was dealing with the moral dilemma of what I should do with the found money. I so badly wanted to keep the money as I am heavily in debt with all my credit cards almost maxed out. I tried rationalizing: The bank slip doesn't have the account number on it so it's not like one can trace it but it did say that the person had a balance of $195.00 which isn't very much.

 I remembered how I felt when I once left $20.00 in the bank machine myself and went back for it but it was gone.

 I then decided to go into the bank and leave the $40.00 with a bank teller. While I was waiting in line, another lady came into the bank and told me I left my card in the bank machine so I went back to get it. Then she came back again saying now I'd left my bank slip in the machine. This is how frazzled I was!

 Anyways, I gave the money to a bank teller with my business card and I am feeling much better.

 I feel like the Universe gave me an opportunity not only to redeem myself but also an opportunity to change my vibration after something I've done in the past that I feel badly about.

 Indeed! This client demonstrates the wonderful way the Law of Attraction works: Her dominant intention was to offer a high vibration so that she can attract more money and enjoy her life.

 The Law of Attraction arranged an opportunity (the item from Radio Shack.) Her actions in the first opportunity caused her vibration to drop, which didn't feel good. So she RESET her intention to feel good,and the Law of Attraction sent her another opportunity to take actions that feel better.

The Power of Allowing

I don't know why, but it seems we trip over the "allowing" part of the Deliberate Attraction formula more often than the other two parts. The Deliberate Attraction formula gives us a simple description of how to leverage the Law of Attraction so we can attract more of what we DO want and enjoy. The three steps are simply:

 1) Become very clear about what you DO want.
 2) Raise your internal vibration, through removing doubts and fears, so you are a vibrational match for your desire.
 3) Allow your desire to come to you.

 Much has been written already about the first two steps. You'll find lots of personal stories and succinct teaching in my articles at YouCanHaveItAll.com. But how do we "allow"--what do we need to do to actually receive what we so clearly desire, yet do not have?

 Recently, I had a nice experience of what it feels like to "allow." I've been noticing that my office wastebasket is inadequately spilling over too often. It is just a little eight-inch sea-grass basket and it hardly holds two days worth of opened envelopes and crumpled paper. After months of mentally complaining about its lack of capacity, I finally asked myself, "So, what kind of wastebasket would I like?"

 I began to imagine a sleek, black, matte finish wastebasket--about 15 inches high with a 12 inch diameter top, and tapered at the bottom. Yes, that would be adequate for a week's worth of trash from my office and it would look professional alongside my other black office accessories.

 Next I collected data on possible wastebaskets. For about a week, every time I entered a building that might have my ideal wastebasket, I looked for it. I found step-on aluminum cans--no, I don't want to step on anything. I found black plastic trash bins with swivel lids--no, I don't want a swivel lid--I want an open receptacle so I can toss paper into it. I found black trash cans on wheels--too industrial looking. I found ceramic pots that were almost right--too heavy to empty out. I was noticing the price range went from $18.99 to $49.99.

 Finally, I let it go. I told myself, "The right one will show up." And it did.

 I was at the Hudson Bay Store, here in Victoria, BC, making a purchase when I decided to cash-in some of my "Reward Points" for a gift certificate. I had NEVER thought about cashing-in Reward Points before--it had never occurred to me to do so. I took the elevator to the fifth floor and while a delightful young lady at the Reward Counter prepared my gift certificate, my eye scanned across the isle. There I noticed A BLACK WASTEBASKET--just the size and shape I had pictured in my imagination. With gift card in hand, I swiftly crossed the isle and lifted the basket. "Ah, it is made of felt-board--very lightweight. Matte black finish with nail-head trim. About 14 inches high and 12 inches in diameter--tapered at the bottom. Very professional looking." I turned the basket upside-down to read the price: "$16.99." Very good! With my gift certificate in hand I proceeded to the checkout stand. When the clerk scanned the price, she gasped and asked me, "How much do you think this costs?"

 "Well, the sticker says '$16.99'."

 She was shaking her head in disbelief as she replied, "It's on sale for $5.00."

 "Five dollars?" I asked, in complete surprise.

 "Five dollars," she repeated.

 "I'll pay cash and save my gift certificate!"

 Can you imagine the joy I felt at that moment? Not only was the price right, but the manner in which my exact desire had come to me was absolutely delicious!

 "Allowing" is simply the old adage: "Let go, and let God." It's "Detachment from the outcome." More like "Detachment from forcing something to happen."

 Allowing is truly letting the Law of Attraction bring your desire into your sphere in its own time, place and manner. Allowing doesn't mean getting second best--it means allowing the Law of Attraction to bring your exact desire--in the BEST way possible.

 Is there something you are not allowing through trying to make it happen or by wanting it a certain way or at a certain time? Let it go. Believe that the Law of Attraction WILL bring it to you in the perfect time and the perfect way. Believe it because that IS the law.

How you have the power to manifest whatever you desire?

Some of the things people most desire to have, or to improve in their life are money, a loving relationship, a successful job, great health, nice house, and a new car. Most people just dream about these things, but never actually obtain them. What people don’t realize is that all of these things can be theirs through the power of manifestation

 Manifesting ones desires is a science. There are laws that govern the process of materializing wishes seemingly out of nothing. Once these laws are complied with, anyone can make their dreams a reality. This may seem very unbelievable to some, but the truth is it’s very real.

 The Law of Abundance- Everything you desire begins in your mind and it is the mind that brings these thoughts to life. Your outer state of being is the manifestation of your thought. Therefore, to obtain the things you desire, you have to first set your mind to it. Vital self-empowerment skills will help you mentally transform a thought into a material manifestation. You will learn how to change your expectations in order to change your life. We live in a Universe of abundance, although most others appear to view it as a Universe of scarcity. Thoughts such as others are more talented, more deserving, and more gifted than you only hinder you from living abundantly. If you are possess these same thoughts, don’t worry, there is hope for you! You can learn skills to activate self-actualizing power through these Laws to live with wealth, financial freedom, and success.

 Abundance does not mean mere accumulation of material wealth. Happiness, peace of mind, harmony, optimal health, being in loving relationships, and having a strong sense of your True Self are also part of this universal abundance. This abundance comes into a person's life only when he facilitates its free flow from him and through him. There are also other ways to increase abundance in your life. Add time to your day, simplify, or make a difference in the world. For example, volunteer work and meditation are good ways to increase abundance. Be more open-minded and open to new possibilities. Try to only surround yourself with positive influences such as people and things.

 Take control of your thoughts and start manifesting your desires today!

How to Become a Master of Flirting?

Many people believe that the art of flirting is something that you either have or you don’t. This isn’t true at all. The art of flirting is something, which can be mastered by anyone with an interest in learning how to flirt. It’s a practice-makes-perfect skill, which is learned from the inside out. Everyone masters the art of flirting differently, but there are some basics of the art of flirting which might help you to find the flirt within and bring her out to play.

 The first thing to know about the art of flirting is that it’s something, which can be done by anyone. You don’t need to be the most attractive person in the room (and beauty is a subjective quality anyone) and you don’t have to be the smartest, most athletic or most outgoing either. The art of flirting is designed to bring out the wonderful qualities that are unique about you and to let them shine so that others can be drawn to them. In this way, the art of flirting begins from the inside. Knowing the qualities you like about yourself and using them as a basis, the art of flirting is an art of quiet confidence.

 But you want to know what to do to let others know that you’re a terrific person right? The art of flirting is an art, which is primarily non-verbal. They say that the eyes are the keys to the soul and you should use yours as a starting point for the art of flirting. Have you ever been glancing around a room, bored and disinterested in what was going on around you when a stranger caught your gaze and held it for a few moments? For most people, this causes the heart to race and the mind to start whirring, wondering what it was about them that caught someone’s attention. People are drawn to others who are attracted to them and you can convey your interest at many levels with the different types of looks you give to people. The art of flirting will incorporate many different types of gazes. If you are in a public setting and just want to catch the eye of a stranger, meeting their gaze and holding it for a few seconds then letting it go followed by meeting it again is the best method. This quickly conveys that you are interested in flirting with them and you will be able to tell from their reaction whether or not they share your interest. More aggressive flirting is done through giving the object of flirtation a look, which says, “I am thinking dirty things about you”. Sometimes this is done with a lingering gaze, sometimes with an up-and-down-the-body glance and sometimes with a stare, which suggests that you are hungry and looking to devour them.

 In addition to eye contact, the art of flirting makes use of other types of body language. Positioning your body in such a manner that shows you are open to communication is crucial to the art of flirting. Touching the other person is also a big part of the art of flirting, but it should be done cautiously. You should read the other person’s body language to determine whether they are welcoming the signals you are sending out. You’ll be able to tell if it’s appropriate to touch their arm or lean your leg against theirs while talking. The art of flirting consists of a combination of conveying your intentions while reading the signals of the other person. A successful combination of these two things which stems from a foundation of casual confidence in your own self worth makes the art of flirting enjoyable and fun.